My heart aches for love once more
But everytime a chance of love comes along
My heart freezes up and slams the door
I close up and move away
Everytime and any day
But then I pine for love that's true
I look around and jealousy consumes
My soul and essence and no escape can be made
Until my body finds itself in the arms of another
My heart warms up and my body unstiffens
I relax and pretend that I don't know
Exactly how the night will go
He cuddles closer but I don't pull away
My heart screams warnings
But my body zones out
Onto the pressure of his hand around my waist
Then before my heart can realize what's happening
My body allows me to be turned
His mouth meets mine in a sweet kiss filled with sin
Which makes my body shiver with wantedness
As the kiss ends I feel my body smile
It's not until later that I can hear my heart crying in pain
And when I finally do I come out of th etrance
I realize the mistake I repeated again
I scold my body and apologize to my heart
The tears I cry scar my face
With blaring truths and bitter lies
Lies I've told myself to get me through
Telling my heart that I can change
Promising I'll never let it happen again
Telling my body that I don't need that warm wantedness
And how I don't want him ever again
But as the tears fall the truth is revealed
I want to please my body and my heart
But somehow I'm not able to
My heart screams to be loved
My body screams to be wanted
While my mind races with compromises and deals
To make everything alright
But every compromise ends the same
And the scars of my tears have helped to make my heart wary
Therefore hurting me so
Because since my heart won't open
I can't truly love
And since love isn't an option
My body takes advantage of my hearts weakness
And convinces me once more of my need to be wanted
Forces my mind to decide on a guy
And then I find myself in the same scenerio
With his lips on mine
Burning me with the knowledge that I gave in once more
But as the burning continues
My body convinces me that it's because I want this
That the burning is right
And as I continue to burn
My heart freezes shut
Not willing to be hurt
Not wanting to be tricked once more
And I fall into a continuous circle
Of burning pains of wanted kisses on my lips
And scorching hands apon my hips
But the scars aren't seen through my layers of lies
My smile foolds them
My flirtiness warms them
And without knowing it
I'm trapped once more
A poisonous trap slowly intoxicating my heart
And everyone is deaf to its screams of pain
And everyone is too blind to see
My heart that is slowly dying
As the poison kills it
And if it's not saved soon
Love will be
A lost cause
I've only dreamt of
